Mailing It In!

Well, with roughly 50 percent of my readership complaining that I didn’t write anything yesterday, I figure I might as well mail in a post today.

So, how about those sports teams? Yeah, I can’t believe that big game last night. It was so exciting.

And what’s the deal with ESPN? Don’t they know that the American public has grown tired of their bullshit? If I wanted to see that thing I saw on their channel last night then I would have tuned into a different channel that generally covers that type of subject material.

Paris Hilton sure is a slut. Did you see she was drinking alcohol last night? Rumor has it she was making out with Suge Knight at an ESPY’s after party. (With Leather)

Do you know what’s coming up next Wednesday?

I’ll give you a hint…

It. Is. Nooow Post Time!

And party time…

It’s time for breakfast on enchanted mornings…

And excitement in the afternoons…

The time is now…

The place is here…

Saratoga. Saratoga! SARATOGA!

That’s right boys and girls. Thoroughbred horse racing is returning to the Capital Region a week from tomorrow. I for one could not be more excited.

Next Friday is Sunset Racing which means a 2:45 post time. I don’t work Friday afternoons (it’s for suckers) so if anyone wants to go up and gamble…let me know. Can Deadspin Pants Parties happen at the track? I’m sure Will Leitch will let me know. (Note: That was an obvious name drop so that Deadspin finds this totally mailed in post and links it up based solely on the fact that I mentioned the site. Isn’t the blogosphere great?)

Hell, I might take next Wednesday off. Who wants to go to opening day? Anyone? Hello? Bueller?

Justin and I had the honor of playing guitar hero for the first time the other day. It was magical.

I now know what all the kids are talking about. It’s incredibly addicting and hard as hell. My favorite part is after playing a couple consecutive songs everything in the room starts to move around like you’ve just taken a HST-sized hit of acid (Just my guess). Who says video games aren’t good for you?

The GF’s parents had their first clam steam of the summer Sunday. It was a special day all around. In (a couple days less than) two months Lauren comes home. I can’t believe that it’s been almost 10 months already. It’s weird because it’s gone by surprisingly quick, yet it has still sucked huge monkey balls at points.

I have to go sit in an auditorium and listen to the safety and security presentation for incoming freshman for the 4^th time in 2 weeks now. I know all about the crime triangle of Opportunity, Desire and…they always loose me at Desire.

Oh, I almost forgot to mention that the Bill Engvall Show is premiering on TBS tonight at 9! So, if you need me at 9:03, I’ll be hanging from the rafters in my apartment. (That’s right, there are rafters in my apartment. What? You don’t believe me? Fuck you. Disprove me from where you’re sitting!)

Oh yeah, I can’t kill myself just because some shitty new show is coming to TBS! I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry is coming out this Friday! Promotional consideration tells me that the film also stars the lovely Jessica Biel!